Top Synergy examines the long-term commitment of individuals to their relationships through two different lenses:

a) the individual incentive to commit both now and in the future; and

b) the individual capacity to live up to this commitment.

From the initial angle of "do I want to commit?", commitment is equivalent to a conscious decision whereby one cares for another and wishes to maintain the relationship. The individual deems the relationship valuable enough to invest the energy it requires over time.

However, even though the search for commitment is based on the deeply instilled human need for security and predictability, a strong and prolonged commitment requires that we maintain confidence in both ourselves and our partners. How many of us trust ourselves? By extension, how many of us can wholeheartedly trust others? Hence the question "can I commit?"

Top Synergy analyzes three aspects of the commitment component of a relationship:

1) The ability of an individual to make a long-term commitment;

2) The same applies to the other individual;

3) The intensity attributable to a relationship that is only possible when both parties gain meaningful values and assets from their capacity to commit.


Q. What types of relationships require commitment?
A. Actually, all long-term relationships strive upon mutual commitment. Common illustrations are: marriages, close knit partnerships and friendships.


Q. What if I my commitment to my partner is one-sided?
A. Most important - don't take your partner's behavior personally. Many people have an all-encompassing challenge with commitment, may it be career-oriented or in their relationships. This phenomena relates to lack of coordination (disharmony) between that individual's goals (blueprint), plan of execution and tools to serve the plan.

Long-term relationships have a hard time surviving without mutual commitment. Even if one feels that his or hers commitment is strong enough to support the relationship, this unilateral power has the tendency to erode over time. Remember, however that life goes on and offers ample opportunities. Crunch your current relationship through the Relationship Analyst™. We feel certain that you will detect your partner's lack of commitment, but at the same time - you will gain confidence in using Top Synergy's tools to identify your future successful relationships.


Q. How can there be mutual commitment when it lacks on one side?
A. Imagine a relationship where one of the partners demonstrates total openness in his/her communication and actions, and it rubs off the other so he/she slowly grows and develops confidence in sharing and receiving constructive criticism?

In general, most of us are are strongly affected by our social- and relationship-settings. We'll close up and withdraw in one environment and open up and grow in another. It all depends on the quality of soil, fertilization, and other nourishment or its lack of.

If our partner demonstrates the power of total love and acceptance, of allowing for vulnerability and for giving control away (that is giving false control away in return for true sense of wholesomeness) - it will eventually rub off on us and cause us to open up to further learning and escalated development.

However, this pattern works both ways. One may find it hard to stay committed to an unfaithful partner, to be attracted albeit rejection, and to maintain openness and sincerity opposite constant petty criticism.


Q. How can I know whose influence will be greater when energies are not balanced?
A. Currently we weigh the "weak link" (lesser energy) at 60% and the higher energy that is radiated into the relationship at 40% only. Even so, if one partner's commitment is very strong, it can bring up mutual commitment to levels above average.

Probings by members have brought up recently a better way to find out whose energies are more dominate and should be given higher weight when calculating mutuality. It brings us back to the research phase and first years on the web (1999 - 2005), when we also computed the "power" of each partner's energies. Since we are now re-designing the reports and the underlying database structure and processes, we'll reinstate this data and use it to derive at the strength of mutual energy based on the balance of power between the parties.