Just wondering about a report that I did on my ex-husband. Can you tell me about this? I still feel a very large pull towards him and I'm not sure why.
Relationships Analyst Report by Top Synergy

We were together for a very long time but, obviously, it wasn't meant to be. I am just looking to not repeat the same thing in the next man I meet.

Thanks!

As the report tells us, the pull you feel towards your ex can be a result of two aspects in your relationship:

1. The strong physical attraction that you have for him; mind you - it's not necessarily sexual attraction. It may very well be the comfort of balance that you feel in his vicinity.

2. A strong, mutual, and balanced commitment between you two. Quite often, the aftermath of a divorce can leave you with moments and even periods of uncertainty and insecurities that could have been avoided or smoothed away with a committed partner next to you. This by itself gives you enough opportunities to feel regrets or a desire to have him by your side again.

Your intimacy, however, is something else altogether. Your relationship lacked any meaningful level of intimacy. Each of you had continued to live in his own world as before the marriage and you haven't grown together through change. In a simplistic way, we can say that there was no emotional or spiritual friendship in your couplehood.

How far off (or on) am I reading into your relationship? The table at the bottom of the report shows "teammates" as the only type of a relationship that enjoys, in your case, the necessary ingredients to be successful. How well does the term "good teammates" describes your relationship?

Your desire to study past patterns and derive your conclusions about what needs to be changed in the future for further development should be commended. Your report calls for a partner with whom your cosmic energies create a wholesome picture in all the relevant departments in long-term love relationships: commitment, intimacy, and passion.

I would suggest that you'll run a few reports opposite past relationships, favorite famous people from our database, and mainly - opposite yourself, in order to diagnose if the lack of intimacy towards your ex is a one-time drama or more of an across-the-board pattern with you, which in turn will provide you with your next lesson in life - developing love and trust toward yourself.

__________________
Cheers,
Shlomo Tommer
Top Synergy Admin
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Thank you. I guess that explains a lot. We are still very good friends so that helps me understand why. We have been divorced for 3 years now (plus I moved away). We still keep in touch so I was getting a bit confused as to our relationship. This opens my eyes quite a bit.